Women Beware! I’m coming For You!


Women!!The words kept ringing in my head; “Please forget about me. I’m sorry to have allowed you build so much hope and confidence in me. I am not what you thought I was. Also, I don’t love you. I have never done. Please take your mind off me…” I tried to overlook the letter, thinking it was one cruel joke but the stark reality was that it was real and in Mellisa’s handwriting!

Then, the accompanying note chilled my blood to the marrows.

“Victor or whatever you call yourself, for your own good, I want you to lay off Lisa unless you don’t want to live to tell what hit you. This is not threat. It is a warning.” It was signed Boss.

It sounded funny and made me laugh but at the same time, I was shocked beyond words and felt an aura of danger. If I had known, I would have taken the warning and laid off and maybe, I wouldn’t have found myself in hospital with battered limbs, broken jaw and ribs. I would have stayed away from Lisa if I had known that the innocent looking self- acclaimed righteous virgin was the mistress of a notorious gang leader. I wouldn’t be in this mess if I had listened to the voice of reason and taken the advice of friends and relations. But I was so hooked on the captivating Jezebel that I lost all sense of direction.

Now, lying on my bed at the orthopaedic hospital, I try to think. Could it be really possible that a girl I had given all for can treat me in this way and shatter my only dream of a future? But the letter and the accompanying assault on me says it all. I had lost the only love I was holding onto and that experience had helped to reshape my outlook to life in general. The words of that old song by Rod Stewart filtered into my mind:

“The first cut is the deepest.”

Yes, Lisa has cut me real deep but I won’t let it stop at that. I will leave this hospital strong and with a new resolve to hit them too where it hurts. The fathers have eaten sour grapes and the children’s teeth are on edge. Lisa has cut me deep and other female species will live to suffer retribution;  as simple as that. Had I not seen and read about men who became demented or became emotionally shattered because of heart breaks? I would have been a victim of that cold and calculating bitch but after my experience, I’d programmed my mind in such a way that little could shake me and I could take disappointment in my stride without much ado. But this situation made me sit back and think again of my relationship with the opposite sex. I had believed that a relationship should be built on solid trust, confidence, sincerity and mutual honesty and this premise made me plunge into the relationship with Lisa and I gave all I had to make it solid and future bound. From all indications, it was future and altar bound and full of hope. Friends and relations commented on our compatibility and we became the envy of many.

Had I known what was to follow, would have been a bit cautions but threw caution to the winds and went into the affair with my eyes closed. I should have taken Majek, my roommate serious when he jokingly propounded the ‘F’ theory of girls. When asked what he meant by the theory, he had laughed and said simply, “Man, that theory has kept me going and that is why you don’t see me keep girls like you do. I don’t love any girl.

The ‘F’ theory is simply, find the girls, fool them, f–k them and forget them.” I was dumb founded.

This Majek was an enigma. He never kept any girl more than a month and he became my mentor in the affairs of ladies. Now, I intended to practise my man’s point of view and any girl that comes my way will be treated with such callousness that all ladies deserve. Any woman that falls in love with me will be given a shocker. I have vowed to leave a string of heart breaks in my trail. I will so much destroy ladies to make up for my lost innocence. I have steeled myself up to the teeth and I will destroy these perpetual sorrow givers.

I will make sure I pay back these daughters of Eve in their own coins. I now wish Adam had died with all his ribs intact. Then, we wouldn’t have had to cope with the vultures called women. I have suffered enough from the so-called relationship that I am too ready to drown the merciless bitches in their own broil from now on, I am going to employ the ‘F’ theory to the fullest and I am going to hit them where it hurts most. Below the belt and I will make sure it hurts. I have enough venom in me for that.

You can call me a woman hater, an avowed non-conformist, a strait-jacketed chauvinist and you will not be far from the truth. The point is that mothers should warn their daughters to steer clear and husbands should put the reins on their wives and kids should keep their grannies under lock. I am on rampage and I won’t be a sucker any longer.

You might wonder why I am so bitter about these woe mongers. Wait until you read this story and you will see why I will never rest until I get revenge back. Yes, my mother is a woman but that is as far as it goes. I have promised never to treat any woman with kid gloves again. I may get married one day but that will only be to satisfy societal norms and what is expected of a virile young man. But love, that is out.

I met Lisa four years ago. I had just completed my O.N.D Programme and while awaiting my result, I got a teaching job with a private school in my state capital. The school had been making waves in the State and around its environs as regards the calibre of students it churns out yearly. I was just 20, young and energetic. I went into the job with such zeal that surprised even me. I was always punctual for my lessons and I was always well-dressed. I cultivated the respect of staff and students alike. All my friends and even the proprietor commented on my dedication and I was quite close to some of the staff, especially Wale.

It was he who helped me get a room in the house in which he was living since there was no staff quarters. He also encouraged me to come out of my protective shell and nab one of those pretty girls who were quite willing to go out with me. I was not keen on going out with my students but he emphasised that others were doing it and I should not be the odd man out. The girls were willing, ready and young. He said. He even told me two of such girls had contacted him to try and convince me to go out with them. But in truth, none of these girls appealed to me.

To Be Continued…